Thursday, the smartest man on the planet gathered the best and the brightest Democrats and Republicans for American's Health Care Reform Summit for almost 8 hours. We are so doomed. If any one in that room up for election this November returns to Washington to be sworn in January, 2011, we should just roll over, die and leave the insects to inherit the Earth.
This has never been about the uninsured. They are just another sob story like all the other sob stories the Democrats used at the summit. Emotional appeal means the intellectual arsenal is empty. The Democrats have no rational explanation why our health care insurance has to be taken away to insure the uninsured. Neither did the Republicans want to pick out the real lie and expose their own complicity. The government doesn't have enough paper and ink to cover the cost of giving away free, top quality health care. They have to reduce the quality of our health care to a level they can afford.
This is about the survival of a political party. This isn't a grab for power. It is a grasping for straws. To simply call this a grab for power ignores the consequences of failure. The complete financial collapse of Medicare, Medicaid and Social Security would bury the Democratic party.
Since FDR and LBJ, the symbol for the Democratic party has become a Halloween costume of a jackass with Social Security as the head and Medicare and Medicaid as the tail. The Democratic party and government giveaways have become synonymous. When doctors stop taking Medicare and Medicaid patients and the Social Security checks bounce, the Democrats will be blamed. They will be exposed as the criminal thugs who set up these Ponzi schemes.
The Democrats have to take over health care to cover their existing Ponzi schemes but a vote for Obama-care could cost them their cushy jobs. The American public is all taxed out and doesn't want to see any new government giveaways.
As Dionysius said to Damocles, "bon appetit."
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Sunday, February 21, 2010
They Hear But Do Not Listen
I enjoy CPAC because it is like the grass beaters in a tiger hunt.The noise startles the political pundits making them grasp for explains in a reality beyond their comprehension. It made Sunday's parade of political whores more entertaining than usual.
Remember the scene from "Monty Python and the Holy Grail" where a king is trying to explain to two guards that he wants then to keep his son in this room? No matter how simply, loudly or often the king explained his order, the guards just couldn't get it. Today, the Democrat and Republican parties are the guards and the American people are the king.
The Governor of Michigan, that's the state that looks like a mitten and a beggar's cup that does it budget in blood because it ran our of red ink, was asked, "The Tea Party protests, poll numbers and the election in Massachusetts have expressed the American people's opposition to the current health care bill in Congress. Isn't it arrogant to pass the bill with 51 votes using a parliamentary trick?" The governor non-responded, "the people want us to fix health care. We have to do something." The interviewer quickly joined her in the shallow end of the think tank with, "do you think this city is broken? Washington isn't passing any bills."
This brain trust was followed by the circus clowns known as, The Panel. The Democrats interpreted the mood of the public as a desire to break the deadlock in congress by running over the Republicans. The Republicans saw it as a signal to dust off their old conservative campaign speeches. To a man, woman and stupid liberal, they couldn't explain how Ron Paul won the CPAC straw poll. "He's not a mainstream Republican."
If asked to name someone in Washington who both by word and deed upholds their oath to the US Constitution, the top three answers are, Nobody, I don't know and Ron Paul. The message no one within soul sucking range of the beltway can decipher is "return to the constitution." Ron Paul is not mainstream because he stands by the constitution instead of handing out free government cheese. The American have realized they can no longer afford free government anything and want it to end now.
The Big Question of 2010 is does anyone understand what a constitutional federal government means? The liberals love the unconstitutional programs. The conservatives, the unconstitutional laws. The current federal government is more than 50% unconstitutional budget, laws and regulation. How will people vote when they realize their unconditional ox could be gored? It means no free lunch for the kids and no free health care for grandma. No social security or DEA. A federal government of little more than customs, immigration and military. Can people who find common cause in opposition to taxes agree on spending cuts? Do they support the constitution or only oppose Obama's excesses? Any fool can take the first step of a thousand mile journey but few survive the challenges.
The Big Event of the weekend was the Michele Obama interview. The liberals saw the smartest, most articulate first lady in history. The conservatives saw the Queen of "You Know." My count for "you know" was 68. If "right" being substituted for "you know" was included, the count would be closer to 80. 20% of the words slithering between her lips were "umm."
Michele spoke of all of us eating rabbit food without mentioning the government force her vision for our lives requires. "Food deserts" without questioning why the free market hasn't provided grocery stores in those neighborhoods.
[Has anyone wondered how Stevie Wonder auditions his hot looking backup singers?]
Has America really awaken or is it just sleep walking? Can people give up their government dependency for the hardships of Freedom?
Remember the scene from "Monty Python and the Holy Grail" where a king is trying to explain to two guards that he wants then to keep his son in this room? No matter how simply, loudly or often the king explained his order, the guards just couldn't get it. Today, the Democrat and Republican parties are the guards and the American people are the king.
The Governor of Michigan, that's the state that looks like a mitten and a beggar's cup that does it budget in blood because it ran our of red ink, was asked, "The Tea Party protests, poll numbers and the election in Massachusetts have expressed the American people's opposition to the current health care bill in Congress. Isn't it arrogant to pass the bill with 51 votes using a parliamentary trick?" The governor non-responded, "the people want us to fix health care. We have to do something." The interviewer quickly joined her in the shallow end of the think tank with, "do you think this city is broken? Washington isn't passing any bills."
This brain trust was followed by the circus clowns known as, The Panel. The Democrats interpreted the mood of the public as a desire to break the deadlock in congress by running over the Republicans. The Republicans saw it as a signal to dust off their old conservative campaign speeches. To a man, woman and stupid liberal, they couldn't explain how Ron Paul won the CPAC straw poll. "He's not a mainstream Republican."
If asked to name someone in Washington who both by word and deed upholds their oath to the US Constitution, the top three answers are, Nobody, I don't know and Ron Paul. The message no one within soul sucking range of the beltway can decipher is "return to the constitution." Ron Paul is not mainstream because he stands by the constitution instead of handing out free government cheese. The American have realized they can no longer afford free government anything and want it to end now.
The Big Question of 2010 is does anyone understand what a constitutional federal government means? The liberals love the unconstitutional programs. The conservatives, the unconstitutional laws. The current federal government is more than 50% unconstitutional budget, laws and regulation. How will people vote when they realize their unconditional ox could be gored? It means no free lunch for the kids and no free health care for grandma. No social security or DEA. A federal government of little more than customs, immigration and military. Can people who find common cause in opposition to taxes agree on spending cuts? Do they support the constitution or only oppose Obama's excesses? Any fool can take the first step of a thousand mile journey but few survive the challenges.
The Big Event of the weekend was the Michele Obama interview. The liberals saw the smartest, most articulate first lady in history. The conservatives saw the Queen of "You Know." My count for "you know" was 68. If "right" being substituted for "you know" was included, the count would be closer to 80. 20% of the words slithering between her lips were "umm."
Michele spoke of all of us eating rabbit food without mentioning the government force her vision for our lives requires. "Food deserts" without questioning why the free market hasn't provided grocery stores in those neighborhoods.
[Has anyone wondered how Stevie Wonder auditions his hot looking backup singers?]
Has America really awaken or is it just sleep walking? Can people give up their government dependency for the hardships of Freedom?
Monday, February 15, 2010
2012: Why Not the End?
I've been thinking about all the factors that could be in play in 2012. With that kind of bad craziness in the air, why not buy a handful of end-of-the-world lottery tickets.
In 2012 we could see:
1) Worldwide Recession. Joe Bidden's idea of spending your way out of recession has set bush fires in the minds of socialist governments throughout the world. Greece looks like it will be the first to learn the relationship between interest rates and credit ratings.
2) Russia is rearming and learning economic warfare.
3) China's military build up should be blossoming into action soon.
4) Iran is going for the bomb. This will force Israel into a war. A war that could drag in everyone else.
5) South American's move toward communism is already breaking down the supply of food. This could create a flood of refugees moving north.
6) Natural disasters. If all the nations are too broke to provide assistance, the usual number of disasters will add more instability.
7) California is rushing to be the first state to default on its debt obligations. This is not going to be pretty.
8) The Tea Party movement represents a large emotional force opposed to what the federal government is doing. There exists an opposite emotional force that supports what the federal government is doing. The 2010 election will leave one of those emotional forces very anger with the outcome. Both forces will see the 2012 elections at the last stand.
When reason fails, violence follows. I don't see Reason winning any converts from the events above. It is human nature to put off painful decisions until reality leaves no options. When the vice-president of the United States can say, "we must spend our way to prosperity" without being frog-marched to the funny farm, you know the world is no longer playing with a full deck. The entire world is in a hole and it wants to borrow money to buy more shovels.
When the world is insane, Bedlam is the last haven from the crazies.
P.S. If no weather condition can disprove global warming, it is a religion. It is simply assumed to be true and has no place in scientific discussions.
In 2012 we could see:
1) Worldwide Recession. Joe Bidden's idea of spending your way out of recession has set bush fires in the minds of socialist governments throughout the world. Greece looks like it will be the first to learn the relationship between interest rates and credit ratings.
2) Russia is rearming and learning economic warfare.
3) China's military build up should be blossoming into action soon.
4) Iran is going for the bomb. This will force Israel into a war. A war that could drag in everyone else.
5) South American's move toward communism is already breaking down the supply of food. This could create a flood of refugees moving north.
6) Natural disasters. If all the nations are too broke to provide assistance, the usual number of disasters will add more instability.
7) California is rushing to be the first state to default on its debt obligations. This is not going to be pretty.
8) The Tea Party movement represents a large emotional force opposed to what the federal government is doing. There exists an opposite emotional force that supports what the federal government is doing. The 2010 election will leave one of those emotional forces very anger with the outcome. Both forces will see the 2012 elections at the last stand.
When reason fails, violence follows. I don't see Reason winning any converts from the events above. It is human nature to put off painful decisions until reality leaves no options. When the vice-president of the United States can say, "we must spend our way to prosperity" without being frog-marched to the funny farm, you know the world is no longer playing with a full deck. The entire world is in a hole and it wants to borrow money to buy more shovels.
When the world is insane, Bedlam is the last haven from the crazies.
P.S. If no weather condition can disprove global warming, it is a religion. It is simply assumed to be true and has no place in scientific discussions.
Blind Spot
Annie cutting across my lawn, singing "Obama is a smart man with dumb ideas," had me on my porch, shaking my fist and throwing a newspaper. I judge men by their ideas. I don't like the idea of calling a man who inartistically presents me brilliance, dumb. Nothing rational comes out of Obama's mouth but he is smart because he can read a TelePrompTer, speak with an Ivy League accent, has a cute family and has political handlers who know how to win elections with force and fraud.
This country is full of clever, articulate liberals writing columns, blogs and words for TV air-heads. "It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing." Should I call men not worth a moments time or attention smart?
California is going to elect a shiny new governor. It seems the old one has a hole in his back from where the public stuck the knife. Before I continue about the new election, I have to speak my piece. A good man deserves a fair epithet.
I was in California when the public got worked up to recall Grey Davis. The thing you need to know about the California voters is they were more bothered by Davis's boring personality than spending California into the bottom of a spittoon. All the crazies came out for that election and you didn't even see the ones that only make it to cable access TV. Schwarzenegger was the best of the crazies. The public wasn't ready for a hard-core conservative Republican. They didn't want another Democrat. Arnold had an "R" behind his name.
All the pundits spoke about the governor during the first few weeks. After that it was spotty when a pundit found an ax to grind. I speak of those early few months when outsiders paid no attention and the locals are ashamed to remember. I don't know if Schwarzenegger figured it out himself or he hired good men to figure it for him but he put his finger on the three key issues that are destroying California, cost of the unions, legislative spending and the governors lack of authority to stop it.
The governor put three propositions on the ballot for the next election to give him the authority to fix the state. The governor personally did TV commercials explaining the problems and why he needed the changes to fix them. The California lemmings didn't want the spending stopped. They just wanted the budget fixed. When the propositions failed, the pundits returned speaking knowingly of that of which they knew nothing. Schwarzenegger's actions in office after that election are well known. How you choose to judge a man so betrayed is your private counsel as it is also mine.
But I neglect our shiny new toys running for governor. Tell me fool, have you read the laws and constitution of this state? Yet, you promise that which you would have neither the power of authority to deliver. Is my misery the want of spending on education or on unions? Is it the want of spending on anything and everything that causes my misery? Oil fields that once fueled a nation lay idle. Farm lands that once fed a nation are dry and sterile. Is it want of bigger government? Speak to your subjects. Try to lead them from the desert of their own making.
California is dead and too stupid to fall over. It doesn't matter who plays governor when the state is run by the criminally insane.
Democrats piss me off and Republicans make me puke.
This country is full of clever, articulate liberals writing columns, blogs and words for TV air-heads. "It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing." Should I call men not worth a moments time or attention smart?
California is going to elect a shiny new governor. It seems the old one has a hole in his back from where the public stuck the knife. Before I continue about the new election, I have to speak my piece. A good man deserves a fair epithet.
I was in California when the public got worked up to recall Grey Davis. The thing you need to know about the California voters is they were more bothered by Davis's boring personality than spending California into the bottom of a spittoon. All the crazies came out for that election and you didn't even see the ones that only make it to cable access TV. Schwarzenegger was the best of the crazies. The public wasn't ready for a hard-core conservative Republican. They didn't want another Democrat. Arnold had an "R" behind his name.
All the pundits spoke about the governor during the first few weeks. After that it was spotty when a pundit found an ax to grind. I speak of those early few months when outsiders paid no attention and the locals are ashamed to remember. I don't know if Schwarzenegger figured it out himself or he hired good men to figure it for him but he put his finger on the three key issues that are destroying California, cost of the unions, legislative spending and the governors lack of authority to stop it.
The governor put three propositions on the ballot for the next election to give him the authority to fix the state. The governor personally did TV commercials explaining the problems and why he needed the changes to fix them. The California lemmings didn't want the spending stopped. They just wanted the budget fixed. When the propositions failed, the pundits returned speaking knowingly of that of which they knew nothing. Schwarzenegger's actions in office after that election are well known. How you choose to judge a man so betrayed is your private counsel as it is also mine.
But I neglect our shiny new toys running for governor. Tell me fool, have you read the laws and constitution of this state? Yet, you promise that which you would have neither the power of authority to deliver. Is my misery the want of spending on education or on unions? Is it the want of spending on anything and everything that causes my misery? Oil fields that once fueled a nation lay idle. Farm lands that once fed a nation are dry and sterile. Is it want of bigger government? Speak to your subjects. Try to lead them from the desert of their own making.
California is dead and too stupid to fall over. It doesn't matter who plays governor when the state is run by the criminally insane.
Democrats piss me off and Republicans make me puke.
The Last Letter
Dear Madam or Sir,
I must apologize for a most embarrassing error. When I was filling out my company benefits, I mistook your charity for a medical insurance program.
I can only imagine the confusion my doctor's bills caused. Please give my sympathies to the employees involved and explain it was a misunderstanding not a cruel prank.
Sadly, I must terminate my contributions. While I believe strongly in all you do for the community, these are hard times. I have a lot of doctors bills to pay. I may end up seeking charitable assistant myself.
As a small effort to atone for my error, I will personally call the State Insurance Commission and explain your company is in no way, shape or form an insurance company. All those complaints are a horrible misunderstanding.
I must apologize for a most embarrassing error. When I was filling out my company benefits, I mistook your charity for a medical insurance program.
I can only imagine the confusion my doctor's bills caused. Please give my sympathies to the employees involved and explain it was a misunderstanding not a cruel prank.
Sadly, I must terminate my contributions. While I believe strongly in all you do for the community, these are hard times. I have a lot of doctors bills to pay. I may end up seeking charitable assistant myself.
As a small effort to atone for my error, I will personally call the State Insurance Commission and explain your company is in no way, shape or form an insurance company. All those complaints are a horrible misunderstanding.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Our Grandchildren? Hell!
How many times have you heard, "Obama is going to bankrupt our grandchildren?"
Obama is going to bankrupt we the living long before he starts eating the children and grandchildren. Does anyone understand how immediate the threat is? The clown in the White House has spent every waking hour of every day for the last year trying to steal our rights, freedom and money. And the bastard has three more years to take pot shots at us.
Terror attack on U.S. 'certain,' Senate told
http://washingtontimes.com/news/2010/feb/02/terror-attack-us-certain-senate-panel-told/?feat=home_headlines
The five senior leaders of the U.S. intelligence community told a
Senate panel Tuesday they are "certain" that terrorists will attempt
another attack on the United States in the next three to six months.
Opposition in call for protest on Iran anniversary
http://www.google.com/hostednews/afp/article/ALeqM5gW8Wf5gMv3iq88kI0rHqkpv65wHg
Opposition heads on Saturday implicitly called for demonstrations
on the February 11 anniversary of Iran's Islamic revolution, as the
elite Revolutionary Guards warned that any such protest will be crushed.
The roulette wheel of terrorist is spinning and I feel lucky. I'm putting a bottle of Nyquil on black, column 2, number 2 and number 11. I'm guessing Iran and Obama are going to cut loose with everything they have on February 11, 2010.
Obama is going to bankrupt we the living long before he starts eating the children and grandchildren. Does anyone understand how immediate the threat is? The clown in the White House has spent every waking hour of every day for the last year trying to steal our rights, freedom and money. And the bastard has three more years to take pot shots at us.
Terror attack on U.S. 'certain,' Senate told
http://washingtontimes.com/news/2010/feb/02/terror-attack-us-certain-senate-panel-told/?feat=home_headlines
The five senior leaders of the U.S. intelligence community told a
Senate panel Tuesday they are "certain" that terrorists will attempt
another attack on the United States in the next three to six months.
Opposition in call for protest on Iran anniversary
http://www.google.com/hostednews/afp/article/ALeqM5gW8Wf5gMv3iq88kI0rHqkpv65wHg
Opposition heads on Saturday implicitly called for demonstrations
on the February 11 anniversary of Iran's Islamic revolution, as the
elite Revolutionary Guards warned that any such protest will be crushed.
The roulette wheel of terrorist is spinning and I feel lucky. I'm putting a bottle of Nyquil on black, column 2, number 2 and number 11. I'm guessing Iran and Obama are going to cut loose with everything they have on February 11, 2010.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
POTUS Does SOTU
CNBC - President Obama: 1 Year Later - This is an hour tailgate party before the SOTU.
They are setting the tone for the liberal media tonight. Obama's problem is communicating his message not his radical policies.
The liberal media is totally in the tank for Obama, they will declare this SOTU best speech in history.
If Obama is against torture, he should stop giving speeches.
First, an important announcement. Those betting on the first "I." The judges have it at 1 minute 50 seconds into the speech.
As to the total number of "I" in Obama's speech. My scratch pads look like a lifers prison cell wall. The "I" count is 97 including 8 "me" and 5 "my." Karl Rove say 96 "I's" and he knows stuff.
The first Obama Bingo was confirmed in Springfield but I can't make out the state.
No "This is not about me" winners, the phrase was not used.
Blame bets win on "Bush," "confused public, "colleges," "Republicans," "banks," "lobbyists," "pundits," "politicians," "politics." "Washington, D.C.," "Supreme Court," "talk show hosts" and the blame bonus phrase was "I'm not here to point the finger of blame."
Some times before I had to pause live TV due to bleeding ears.
5:40 PM PST - Obama has left the White House
5:55 PM PST - Obama enters the DOME! Children flee, woman faint, men grab their wallets.
6:06:12 PM PST - Deep voice announces the pompous POTUS has entered the chamber.
6:11:20 PM PST - The lies begin.
6:13:10 PM PST - The first "I."
Executive Summary: This crazy bastard is going to get us all killed. He is going to take his Titanic of dubious policies and ram the iceberg of reality at full speed.
Bare with me, I'm trying to sort out my notes. It looks like something about a "full unemployment bill." More tax refunds for people who don't pay taxes.
A good joke for everyone who got their W-2. Our taxes haven't been raised a single penny. It must have been money termites.
The economy has grown 3,00% and he created 20 billion jobs and all his cronies made a lot of money. The recession is over and the unemployment numbers are teabagger lies.
The banks have to be punished for not paying back the bailout money and the bailout money they paid back will be used to hire more government whores.
Obama is going to increase US exports. The only things I've seen him export so far is Hillary, debt and the military. How much do our trading partners pay for a Hillary visit?
On foreign policy, North Korea and Iran can expect more nasty letters. Supported women in Iran by letting them be shot down in the streets.
Something about pink underwear for the troops and equal pay of everyone on the planet.
Obama declared himself one of the founding fathers and called us all slackers.
He said something about diversity but I couldn't hear it over everyone shouting, "BINGO!" He said something about "right thing to do" but I thing me meant left.
As best as I could tell from the speech, Obama thinks Kennedy is still the senator from Massachusetts.
On a scale of 1 to 5 stars, I'd give the speech 1 1/2 slit wrists. The star of this heroin induced fantasy should be fitted for a white suit with extra long arms. Best supporting jumping bean goes to Nancy. Scene stealing extra goes to Joe Bidden for staring at Obama like he was an alien from outer space. I thought Joe was going to stand up with a "I'm not with stupid" t-shirt.
Jokes:
I didn't know they piled shit that high.
Does this speech come with anesthetic?
10 pounds of lies in a 5 pound bag.
Did I come in here with a brain tumor?
Dear God, the bastards are replaying the speech. I'll need more duct tape and recyclable vomit bags.
Either me or the guy giving the speech spent the last year in a parallel universe.
5 minutes in and Nancy started snorting cocaine. I hope she brought enough for everybody.
Never has so much stupid been packed in the same room at the same time. How did they find room for the mountain of lies?
I have to admit a $1,000,000,000,000 is not a single dime and 10% unemployment is not a single person.
I think Obama's speech writer put an electric buzzer in Nancy's seat.
I think someone put an old campaign speech in Obama's TelePrompTer.
It took Obama 70 minutes to say, "bugger off, I'm not changing a bloody thing."
The only people Obama didn't blame during his speech were terrorists.
After that speech, Chris Hardball Boy's leg tinkle could replace Hoover Dam.
There is no truth to the rumor the new secret service code name for POTUS is "pants on fire." Although Nancy is known as "ants in panties."
Bidden didn't fall asleep during the speech. That was a short term coma.
Thank you God, the Obama replay has been interrupt by a scheduled recording of "Green Prono." Who cares what it is. It's not Obama. Wow, it is a 15 minute Fellini version of the Obama speech complete with sniper.
If Burger King make a Bore Whopper, Obama would be on the poster.
Obama's speech was the NBC of late night programming.
I loved the part when Obama said, "And the ghost of Christmas future pointed a bony finger at Tiny Tim's empty chair."
Next Obama speech, I'm asking for hardship pay.
If Obama's speech was found on the streets of New York, he'd be fined for not curbing his dog.
Obama's speech did to America's brain cells what his stimulus package did to the economy.
The guy with the football has to go into hiding immediately. Obama can not be trusted with dangerous objects like nukes and sharpened pencils.
Post Speech questions:
1) Should Obama be fitted for a white suit with extra long sleeves?
2) Do you believe Obama's health care bill will save the economy and create jobs?
3) Do you want a do-over for the 2008 election?
4) If Obama was tree, what kind of nuts would he drop?
5) Will Obama's health care bill cover his psychiatric treatments?
6) Should Obama start smoking again or should we?
7) Where does hubris stop and stupidity begin?
8) Did you see the White Whale in the room?
That's where I heard this speech before. Obama it's Captain Ahab. He's nailed up the gold coins and wants us to chase the great white whale. My name's not Ishmael and not I'm signing up for any watery grave. If the padded-cell junkie wants to start a revolution, he can count me out.
I hope you enjoyed the speech as much as I did.
They are setting the tone for the liberal media tonight. Obama's problem is communicating his message not his radical policies.
The liberal media is totally in the tank for Obama, they will declare this SOTU best speech in history.
If Obama is against torture, he should stop giving speeches.
First, an important announcement. Those betting on the first "I." The judges have it at 1 minute 50 seconds into the speech.
As to the total number of "I" in Obama's speech. My scratch pads look like a lifers prison cell wall. The "I" count is 97 including 8 "me" and 5 "my." Karl Rove say 96 "I's" and he knows stuff.
The first Obama Bingo was confirmed in Springfield but I can't make out the state.
No "This is not about me" winners, the phrase was not used.
Blame bets win on "Bush," "confused public, "colleges," "Republicans," "banks," "lobbyists," "pundits," "politicians," "politics." "Washington, D.C.," "Supreme Court," "talk show hosts" and the blame bonus phrase was "I'm not here to point the finger of blame."
Some times before I had to pause live TV due to bleeding ears.
5:40 PM PST - Obama has left the White House
5:55 PM PST - Obama enters the DOME! Children flee, woman faint, men grab their wallets.
6:06:12 PM PST - Deep voice announces the pompous POTUS has entered the chamber.
6:11:20 PM PST - The lies begin.
6:13:10 PM PST - The first "I."
Executive Summary: This crazy bastard is going to get us all killed. He is going to take his Titanic of dubious policies and ram the iceberg of reality at full speed.
Bare with me, I'm trying to sort out my notes. It looks like something about a "full unemployment bill." More tax refunds for people who don't pay taxes.
A good joke for everyone who got their W-2. Our taxes haven't been raised a single penny. It must have been money termites.
The economy has grown 3,00% and he created 20 billion jobs and all his cronies made a lot of money. The recession is over and the unemployment numbers are teabagger lies.
The banks have to be punished for not paying back the bailout money and the bailout money they paid back will be used to hire more government whores.
Obama is going to increase US exports. The only things I've seen him export so far is Hillary, debt and the military. How much do our trading partners pay for a Hillary visit?
On foreign policy, North Korea and Iran can expect more nasty letters. Supported women in Iran by letting them be shot down in the streets.
Something about pink underwear for the troops and equal pay of everyone on the planet.
Obama declared himself one of the founding fathers and called us all slackers.
He said something about diversity but I couldn't hear it over everyone shouting, "BINGO!" He said something about "right thing to do" but I thing me meant left.
As best as I could tell from the speech, Obama thinks Kennedy is still the senator from Massachusetts.
On a scale of 1 to 5 stars, I'd give the speech 1 1/2 slit wrists. The star of this heroin induced fantasy should be fitted for a white suit with extra long arms. Best supporting jumping bean goes to Nancy. Scene stealing extra goes to Joe Bidden for staring at Obama like he was an alien from outer space. I thought Joe was going to stand up with a "I'm not with stupid" t-shirt.
Jokes:
I didn't know they piled shit that high.
Does this speech come with anesthetic?
10 pounds of lies in a 5 pound bag.
Did I come in here with a brain tumor?
Dear God, the bastards are replaying the speech. I'll need more duct tape and recyclable vomit bags.
Either me or the guy giving the speech spent the last year in a parallel universe.
5 minutes in and Nancy started snorting cocaine. I hope she brought enough for everybody.
Never has so much stupid been packed in the same room at the same time. How did they find room for the mountain of lies?
I have to admit a $1,000,000,000,000 is not a single dime and 10% unemployment is not a single person.
I think Obama's speech writer put an electric buzzer in Nancy's seat.
I think someone put an old campaign speech in Obama's TelePrompTer.
It took Obama 70 minutes to say, "bugger off, I'm not changing a bloody thing."
The only people Obama didn't blame during his speech were terrorists.
After that speech, Chris Hardball Boy's leg tinkle could replace Hoover Dam.
There is no truth to the rumor the new secret service code name for POTUS is "pants on fire." Although Nancy is known as "ants in panties."
Bidden didn't fall asleep during the speech. That was a short term coma.
Thank you God, the Obama replay has been interrupt by a scheduled recording of "Green Prono." Who cares what it is. It's not Obama. Wow, it is a 15 minute Fellini version of the Obama speech complete with sniper.
If Burger King make a Bore Whopper, Obama would be on the poster.
Obama's speech was the NBC of late night programming.
I loved the part when Obama said, "And the ghost of Christmas future pointed a bony finger at Tiny Tim's empty chair."
Next Obama speech, I'm asking for hardship pay.
If Obama's speech was found on the streets of New York, he'd be fined for not curbing his dog.
Obama's speech did to America's brain cells what his stimulus package did to the economy.
The guy with the football has to go into hiding immediately. Obama can not be trusted with dangerous objects like nukes and sharpened pencils.
Post Speech questions:
1) Should Obama be fitted for a white suit with extra long sleeves?
2) Do you believe Obama's health care bill will save the economy and create jobs?
3) Do you want a do-over for the 2008 election?
4) If Obama was tree, what kind of nuts would he drop?
5) Will Obama's health care bill cover his psychiatric treatments?
6) Should Obama start smoking again or should we?
7) Where does hubris stop and stupidity begin?
8) Did you see the White Whale in the room?
That's where I heard this speech before. Obama it's Captain Ahab. He's nailed up the gold coins and wants us to chase the great white whale. My name's not Ishmael and not I'm signing up for any watery grave. If the padded-cell junkie wants to start a revolution, he can count me out.
I hope you enjoyed the speech as much as I did.
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